|
A Jamaican is talking about his last holiday:
»In di 'oliday mi go to Inglan'. Mi live in a big 'otel. In di mornin' mi go to di dining room. Mi call di waitress an tell 'er: «Bring me two pis a toast». But she bring me only one. Mi say: «I want two pis!» She say: «Go to di toilet». Me say: «No mam! You don' understand! I want two pis on my dish! »She say: «You better no pis on your dish, you son of a bitch!» I go back to my room, wanna take a sleep, but dere no shiit on die bed. Me phone up di clerk, tell him «I wan' a shiit». Him say: «Go to di toilet». I say: «Man, you don' understan'! I wan' a shiit on my bed!» 'im say: «You better no shiit on your bed, you son of a bitch!». At lunch time me go back to di dining room, take a seat. Dere's a dish, a knife, a spoon, but no fok. Me call di waitress, tell her: «I wan' a fok!». She say: «Ev'rybody wanna fok.» I say: «Mam, you don' understan'! I wan a fok on di table.» She say:«You better no fok on di table, you son of a bitch!".
Dat's enuff! I pack me tings an leave di 'otel. At di entrance, di clerk tell me »'ave a nice day an' pis on you!« Me say: »Piss on you, too, you son of a bitch, I go back to Jamaica!«"
(I hope it's still funny when it's written down – Else you'll have to read it out loud)
|
